It has been AGES since I journalled here. I don't know how I found my way back to deviant art this month, but I somehow have. Oh me, oh my what a year and a half it's been!

I'm still walking with the Goddess, but now my soul has awakened, fully. I've spent the last 2 years literally putting back pieces of me that broke off and ran away because of the fear, pain and hate they saw coming, and because of the absolute horrors I've experienced in past lives. And I found out that the effects of those have been happening all my life, triggered by various events and needing to be healed so I can find myself.

I've never been truly whole. My soul still needs some work but who I am as a human being is becoming whole at last and I know myself like never before. I'm no longer afraid of living, or of death, my fear of the dark is gone and I love myself, in every way. Hee hee.

And it is an indescribably beautiful thing. I am happy, almost every day, just being who I am, caught in the beauty of the moment. I seek not the past, nor the future. Everything I need to know comes to me just when I need to know it - through my intuition and my heart.

I'm not all darkness any longer, nor am I all light. I've sold most of my old oracle decks and now work with witchy ones and a shaman-inspired Tarot only. I am a healer who is going to be doing a lot of past-life work amongst other things. And though it's taken a while for me to accept that this is who I am, I now know that I am gathering the physical strength for this to happen, when the time is right.

I'm learning to beadweave with seed beadies, and to work with hammer and wire. I am writing a small blog and reaching out to beadie friends and have joined a beadie blog group. I haven't written much poetry lately, but I am writing stories again!

I found out not only has my soul had a LOT of past lives that involved magick, healing, psychics, and mediums but I am actually descended from shamans, witches, healers and mediums in my native bloodline. So time to let go of any and all doubt - all of this IS my Destiny, dammit!

So that is where I am right now - exploring all of my spiritual and physical heritage, once again embracing the love of the dark within me and experimenting with my creativity. I hope to get back to my poetry soon and share it all on here. And I've started making paper collages too!

Blessed Be x